Palin/McCain '12?

I miss Sarah Palin. "I can see Alaska from my front porch," "Joe the Plumber," and all those other moments which seem to have been ripped from SNL's "Weekend Update."

So, I was thrilled to find out a profoundly witty satirist friend of mine has written a new book, Sarah Palin's Secret Diary, forged by Joey Green. This parody exposes behind the scene antics of the extended Palin family and includes such juicy tidbits as books the former Governor would love to burn, how to speak Maverick, waterboarding Tina Fey, campaign slogans for '12, and what Sarah did with all those ritzy clothes.

A perfect holiday gift for your friends who are Democrats (and even Republicans with a sense of humor!), Sarah Palin's Secret Diary is available for just $9.99 through Amazon. If you act now -- or even in a few days -- you can get free shipping with the purchase of three copies!

The link to order Joey's 174-page book is



For more information, go to

It's Five O'Clock Somewhere...

It's five o'clock somewhere in the world. In other words, time for a stiff drink. It may be more socially acceptable to don workout gear on your way to spin class following a tough day at the office. But there will always be a crowd at the local watering hole, toasting the end of day whistle. Whenever I watch "Mad Men" on AMC, I find myself craving one of those cool retro cocktails, evocative of simpler, drunken times. (I also find myself wondering how these folks could possibly have gotten any work done, given their proclivity for midday scotch and groping with secretaries.) I have been considering a trip to Crate & Barrel to purchase highball and double old fashioned glasses. Maybe I will even make some rumaki! So, let's don a skinny tie or little black dress with pearls and clink our glasses. In a virtual sense. I leave you with a collection of classic cocktail recipes in hope you'll invite me over for a swank evening of drinking. We'll leave the cigarettes at home!

Old Fashioned Manhattan

1 oz. whiskey

1/2 oz. sweet vermouth

3 dashes bitters

1 t. sugar

1 splash club soda

Pour the whiskey, sweet vermouth, bitters and sugar into a cocktail glass over crushed ice. Stir well. Top with club soda, and stir again gently. Garnish with a maraschino cherry, and serve.

Tom Collins

2 oz. gin

1 oz. freshly squeezed lemon juice

1 t. superfine sugar

3 oz. club soda

1 maraschino cherry

1 slice orange

In a shaker half-filled with ice cubes, combine the gin, lemon juice, and sugar. Shake well. Strain into a collins glass almost filled with ice cubes. Add the club soda. Stir and garnish with the cherry and the orange slice.

Gimlet

4 parts gin or vodka

1 part Rose's lime juice

Serve straight or on the rocks in an old fashioned glass. Garnish with lime


Whiskey Sour

2 oz. blended whiskey
juice of 1/2 lemon
1/2 t. powdered sugar
1 Maraschino cherry
1/2 slice lemon
Shake blended whiskey, juice of lemon, and powdered sugar with ice and strain into a whiskey sour glass. Decorate with the half-slice of lemon, top with the cherry, and serve.

Champagne Cocktail

2 dashes bitters
1 tsp sugar
chilled Champagne
1 twist lemon peel
Place one lump of sugar with bitters in a chilled champagne flute. Fill with chilled champagne. Add the twist of lemon peel and serve.

Cheers!

Ferris Wheels of Life

Today, I took my daughter to our town's annual namesake event, The Pumpkin Festival. My daredevil daughter is always excited about the prospect of rides and the allure of the all you can ride wristband. Kind of like a compulsive overeater at a Vegas buffet. Much to her chagrin, the actual rides numbered two. A somewhat decrepit-looking carny Ferris wheel and a tot train which circled around the park's sport court. I ponied up a few bucks for a couple of ride tickets and we headed towards the sole ride which could be construed as adventurous in the eyes of a nine year old.

Apparently, the rest of the festival attendees shared our notion. This would undoubtedly be one of life's experiences where time spent waiting would outlast the ride itself. I presume there may be some hidden meaning behind my current obsession with waiting. But, then again, maybe not. In high school and college lit classes, I would often ponder author's intent. Was there a symbolic meaning behind every word or phrase?

Back to the subject at hand. The longer I spent in the line, the more unsure I became about riding the somewhat rickety looking carnival attraction. A sign listing height requirements for children "traveling alone" calmed my nerves, especially when I noticed a few kids who could not have been older than first graders proudly climbing into the seats. Well, that is until the woman in front of us declared she wouldn't be joining her kids because she would "get sick." I had promised my daughter at least a spin on a ride and I was not about to let my hesitation disappoint.

My daughter dropped the tickets into the bucket. We climbed into our basket. The attendant buckled and harnessed us into safety. As we slowly ascended the circle, stopping so others could get on, my daughter commented, "I hope this ride goes really fast so it will be over soon!" I chuckled under my breath. I am more of the "let's just close our eyes if it gets too scary" school of thought.

When everyone was aboard, the ride began more fluid movements. I have to admit, it was rather fun! I sang along to a Journey tribute band as we soared above the park, admiring the mountains in the distance. A beautiful, clear October day in Southern California.

The ride was over within two songs. We climbed out of the basket, ready for an order of freshly cut fries and a hand squeezed lemonade or some other carnival treat. Never one to take things at face value, I thought about the day's lesson. Life sometimes resembles a rickety carnival ride. We spend so much energy worrying about the future, in general and specific. When our basket stops atop to let others on, time stands still. We wish the ride would speed up so we could get off quickly. Anticipation is often much worse than the actual object of fear.

If we admire the surroundings and sing along to the music, the ride becomes less scary. If all else fails, we can always shut our eyes!

Does She or Doesn't She?

This morning, my Yahoo homepage announced the results of a study comparing the primping times of blondes and brunettes. I asked myself, "Why?" Who sponsored this study?

According to the study, brunettes spend 66 minutes per day grooming vs 72 minutes for blondes. In other words, blondes spend 22 days per year vs the brunettes' 19 days. Brunettes are more likely to leave the house without doing their hair and makeup.

I suppose I am the exception rather than the rule. My readers know by now. I am a total girl. Sephora is my candy store. I brake for a fabulous red lipstick and never leave the house without my Dior Show mascara. And I have never nor will ever be a blonde. (Although "some of my best friends are blondes!")

So what can we surmise from this study? Please "enlighten me."

34 x 30, Dark Rinse, Homage to Don Fisher, Founder of Gap

Upon reading of the September 27 passing of Don Fisher, founder of the Gap, I recalled a Saturday Night Live skit which featured Adam Sandler and David Spade in a drag portrayal of "Gap Girls" at the local mall. The two complained about their job duties which included folding sweaters and jeans.

Gap, as it is now referred, most likely has as many critics as enthusiasts. As a brand, the Gap may never dismiss its association with khaki and blue oxford button-down wearing Yuppies on Casual Fridays. Regardless, Don Fisher was a marketing and retail genius as well as generous philanthropist and supporter of the arts.

The first time I stepped into a Gap was in the Willowbrook Mall in Wayne, New Jersey. The perimeter of cubicle-shelved stacks of Levi's was a unique although not particularly inviting concept. Gap was an innovator in the global phenomenon which led to a Starbuck's on every corner. In later years, Gap carried only private label lines, peppered with occasional forays into limited edition "designer" fashion. Some feel Gap does basic best. Khaki's, jeans, cardigans, pullovers. I was a huge fan of the Audrey line a few years back. Skinny capris, shells, ballet flats evocative of a young Hepburn whose image from "Funny Face" appeared on our televisions, dancing to "Back in Black."

Back in 1969, Don Fisher had no retail experience when he opened the first Gap in his hometown of San Francisco, a shop filled with Levi's, records, and tapes. Credited with inventing the specialized retail category, he eventually expanded the company into a nearly $15 billion dollar business with over 134,000 employees and more than 3,100 stores. At first, Don envisioned a small chain of maybe 10 stores selling the casual wear which became quite popular during the 1960s and 1970s.

In the late 1960s, Fisher had leased space in a building he had bought to a Levi's salesman who opened a showroom. Purchasing jeans, he noticed a dearth of sizes and lengths. He envisioned a store which carried a wide assortment of sizes in one place. In his business plan, he noted four basic requirements for success: location (an area populated by 12-25 year olds), sufficient parking, adequate stock, and the right employees. Don and Doris opened the first Gap on San Francisco's Ocean Avenue. The store was a smashing hit. The company went public in 1973 and the stock split nine times since then. In 1972, the Gap label was launched. Retail whiz Mickey Drexler was hired in '83. The Gap acquired a small two story and catalogue company called Banana Republic. A few years later, they created Old Navy which became the first retailer to reach a billion dollars in sales in fewer than four years. Today, the company brands include online shoe purveyor Piperlime which has added an edited line of designer jeans and casual clothing and Athleta, a yoga and activewear online site. Several years back, the company launched Forth and Towne, a retail experience targeted to the 35 plus customer who grew up with but lost touch with the Gap. All stores were closed after an 18 month trial run.

Gap, with its five subdivisions, continues to be the largest speciality retailer in the U.S. Don and Doris Fisher's original concept of a small chain of casual wear shops selling jeans and music to 12-25 years olds during the Youth Quake mushroomed into a retail and cultural phenomenon.

Waiting for Godot!

The average American spends 159 hours in a lifetime waiting. OK, I just pulled that number out of my hat. As I spent much of today "lying in wait," I came up with a lifelong timeline of detainment. Here goes...

In utero: We spend approximately forty weeks waiting for our arrival into this world. Starting as a fertilized egg, we slowly develop from a tadpole into the more humanlike fetus. And then we wait...

Infancy: Much of babyhood is spent waiting. Waiting for a bottle or feeding. Waiting to be burped. Waiting to be changed. No wonder babies cry with so much frustration! It is almost worse than the DMV!

Toddler Stage: We have made it through infancy but are still waiting....Waiting for mom or dad to pick us up. Still waiting with the dirty diaper. Waiting for the next spoonful of mushy cereal. Waiting to eat something that doesn't resemble paste from a jar...Waiting for that first tooth to erupt...

Pre-Scho0l: The official home of learning to wait. Wait your turn on the tricycle. Wait for the purple crayon. Wait for the juice and cookies. Wait for your turn to talk...

Kindergarten: Still waiting. Waiting for the bus. Waiting for mommy or daddy to pick us up. Waiting for our turn in the bathroom. Waiting for the ball. Waiting for Susie to be finished with the doll.

Elementary School: Waiting for our turn as flag or office monitor. Waiting for the teacher to notice we are raising our hand. Waiting for our turn at the handball court or jump rope. Waiting to write the answer on the chalkboard. Waiting for the bus...

Junior High/Middle School: Waiting for our crush to notice us. Waiting for our friends to notice our new haircut, shirt, jeans. Waiting for an invitation to a big party. Waiting for our teacher to grade our essay. Waiting for the most popular school lunch. Waiting to get to high school.

High School: The waiting continues....Waiting to get a grade back. Waiting to find out if we made the team or got the lead part. Waiting to find out if that cute boy in Spanish likes you. Waiting for your friend to find out if he likes you. Waiting to see if he'll ask you to Homecoming. Waiting for your license. Waiting for a car. Waiting for your SAT scores. Waiting for your thick college acceptance letter. Waiting for your prom date. Waiting for graduation.

College: Waiting to register. Waiting for a bid from a sorority or fraternity. Waiting to sign up for a popular course. Waiting for an internship. Waiting in line at the keg. Waiting to talk to the professor. Waiting to talk to that guy or girl in your Psych 101 class. Waiting to find out if he or she has a girlfriend or boyfriend. Waiting for to find out a grade. Waiting to see if you got into Junior Year Abroad. Waiting for an internship. Waiting for graduation. Waiting for interviews. Waiting for a job.

Adulthood: Waiting. Waiting in line at the DMV, at the market in the express line in back of someone with 12 items. Waiting at the doctor's office/dentist's office/any office which only has year old "People" Magazines and "AARP." Waiting for test results. Waiting to hear about a job. Waiting for a returned phone call/text/e-mail. Waiting to pick up an accident report which isn't yet ready. Waiting at the pharmacy, both when you drop off a prescription and pick it up. Waiting for bread to rise. Waiting for something else to rise. Waiting at the cleaners, the bank, the post office. Looking back and noticing the line behind is now longer than the line in front which is the most fulfilling part of waiting.

Waiting for the bus. Waiting for a cab. Waiting for our outgoing or incoming flight. Waiting for someone else's incoming flight.

Waiting for the proposal. Waiting for the ring. Waiting to find out if she accepts. Waiting for the wedding. Waiting for the honeymoon. Waiting to find out if you got the house. Waiting for the movers. Waiting for the cable guy/electrician/plumber or anyone else with a four-hour window. Waiting for the home pregnancy test. Waiting for the doctor. Waiting for amnio results. Waiting to tell everyone. Waiting till the sixth month. Waiting for labor pains. Waiting for the epidural.

And then it starts all over again!

Better than "Tex"

A FB friend from high school posted she was doing mani/pedis and shoe shopping with her mom. Later on, she posted she bought three pairs of sunglasses for the price of one and one pair of shoes. I would have preferred the other way around!

I told her I was monogamous with my Chanel sunglasses but with shoes, I play the field. Although I live in sunny L.A., I have always been dedicated to one pair of expensive shades. Predating Blackberry and i Phone, I once left a sexy pair of Laura Biagotti's at the public phone at Kate Mantilini in Beverly Hills. This set me back $300 and a measure of personal pain. At one time, in NY, I did flirt with two pair of trendy Alain Mikli cat eyes which I turned into regular glasses. Very eighties. In college, I sported gold Vuarnets with that pink loop around my neck.

My obsession with Chanel started many years ago. I knew the time was right to purchase my stunning black Chanel shades which I will never give up. Till death do us part.

Shoes, however, are a completely different story. See, I am a shoe word that rhymes with door. (My 13 year old daughter is a follower of this blog so I will keep this rated PG!) The more, the merrier. If a pair of sexy and preferably expensive shoes so much as winks at me, I am off and running. I am not the kind of girl to wear the same pair of shoes each day, despite the name of this column. I am a footwear flirt.

Today, I made a quick pit stop into Nordstrom's Rack, just to check out the scene. Much like a cougar scans the crowd at the local watering hole, I was drawn to the shoe rack in my size. Wow! Jimmy, Manolo, and Christian all awaited in my size! I resisted temptation but had a brief thought. Finding a pair of uber designer shoes at a discount outlet can be somewhat orgasmic. Scratch that. From what I recall, perhaps better than word that rhymes with Tex....

Screw Traffic!

Driving on the freeways of Southern California, one notices all sorts of reasons for traffic tie ups. Accidents, stalled cars, debris in the roadway. Yesterday, someone left a blow up doll in the middle of the carpool lane of the 60 freeway in Mira Loma.

We have all seen movies where some jerk kicks his girlfriend out of the car following an argument. This leaves me wondering what the blow up doll did to warrant such a reaction. Certainly, she didn't spurn his sexual advances. I thought that was kind of the point of blow up dolls, aside from perhaps some sexual fetish.

What would Ponch and Jon do?

Top Ten List of Why Not To Bang Your Female Employees

This just in from The Home Office. Last night, in a stranger than life on camera appearance, David Letterman admitted to his audience he had sex with his female employees. Not one. Presumably not two. He was forced to come clean following an extortion attempt by a male producer who threatened to write a movie or book about his claim. The producer has since been charged with grand larceny.

I heard chuckling from the studio audience who may have thought this was a joke. I mean, I am a firm believer that humor and power (and really good champagne) are aphrodisiacs. Yet, I am a bit skeptical about the sexual draw of the gap toothed Letterman. Who would have thunk? This guy married his longtime girlfriend after siring a son in midlife. He has suffered from heart ailments which, from the warning voice in drug ads would preclude him from taking Viagara or Cialis. I would have thought he "might have been advised by his doctor he might not be healthy enough for sexual activity." At least sexual activity with most of his employees!

In an era of sexual harassment lawsuits, I am frankly surprised Dave would mix business with pleasure, especially with a multitude of underlings. Didn't he think they might talk by the water cooler?

The top story on my local 11:00 news featured comments by the manager of The Comedy Store and Jeannie Wolf, TV gossip columnist, who concurred that this scandal would bounce off Dave. Fodder for other late night hosts.

Oh, what I would give to be a fly on the wall at The Late Show's office Christmas party!

So Play the Game of Life!

A few months back, I blogged about "solemates," friendships and the like. Life in transition, I've become contemplative. Life resembles the eponymous board game, you know the one with the little cars and pink and blue stick people? Roll the dice, move five spaces ahead. Next turn, take a time out or move back four spaces.

Sometimes life is in the roll of the dice or a game of chance. An eternal glass half-full girl, I am a firm believer in fate. We meet seemingly random people who help guide us to our next place, professionally and personally. That is, if we are open to the experience.

I've been fortunate in the past few months to reconnect and also to meet a group of amazing new friends. Make new friends and keep the old. Chance meetings have led to close friendships and new career opportunities. Through Craigslist, I met a clothing designer with an artist husband. I felt an instant rapport. The designer is making some clothing for me; I will be repping her husband's artwork. Attended a wine tasting event a few months back, expecting to taste some nice wines and catch up with some girlfriends. Ended up meeting an amazing new friend who has helped me through some rough spots.

What we put out, we get back in spades. Karma. The Golden Rule. When we put our positive energy and a smile into the universe, we'll receive positive energy and smiles in return.

OMG! I Am Going to be a Mom!

"Like, I have been throwing up for like two mornings now..." Pan to bathroom vanity covered with home pregnancy tests....Wow! They are so cute and purple! "I can't hide this from Khloe much longer but it is just so hard for me to say I am pregnant." "OMG, I am going to be a mom." "I think I'll pose nude while pregnant. I don't know. I'll have to think about it." "I like when you can see it, I like run around at home naked all day."

Kourtney Kardashian is like a fountain of knowledge about like the whole pregnancy thing...

Now, I have absolutely no gripe with the Kardashian/Jenner crew. I have shopped in Smooch and Dash, seen Bruce at my local Starbuck's, and even have some mutual friends. And I have heard reality tv editors confess to utilizing editing and scripts to spin the story. There's no such thing as bad publicity, yada yada yada. An eternal optimist who sees the good in virtually everyone, I am hoping these quotes are taken out of context. I mean, Kourtney like graduated from the like University of Arizona...

Last week's episode, "All Men Are Dogs," showed a nauseated Kourtney of late period on a road trip through the Everglades with sister Khloe in their Porsche Cayenne. Derailed and saved by a few Floridian guys who reminded me of the 70s film "Deliverance," they spent the night in a bug infested cabin without like cell service. Bummer. (What happened to the camera crew?) Jumbled shots of barf in the toilet and retching noises throughout. Gross!

According to Kourtney, she like forgot to take her pill. No worries. The pregnancy has like "improved her relationship" with boyfriend Scott. Good to know. In this week's US, Scott gushes on his favorite qualities of his baby mama. "I think she's gorgeous. Her body is perfect." Yikes.

I am guessing the sister on sister competition is also a publicity stunt? Kim Kardashian told E!, "She's huge. She is huuuuge! I think she's in denial of buying maternity clothes, because she just borrows Khloe's clothes." "Khloe is going to kill me for saying that, but it's really because Khloé is so much taller. Kourtney will take Khloé's top and wear it as a dress...She will not buy maternity clothes. I don't know what's wrong with her." Wow.

Kim also told a website, "She just only craves healthy food . . . I gotta get pregnant." Double wow.

You know, I have like only the best wishes for like Kourtney and Scott. Really. In fact, I may even go into Smooch, Kourney and Kris's children store, to buy a gift! Like, totally!

Sanka for the Starbuck's Crowd

Please say it ain't so...

As a Starbuck's junkie who looks forward to my daily fix, I have adjusted my coffee consumption during this economic downturn/recession. Unless I am meeting a colleague or friend, I brew at home. To me, the Starbuck's experience has always been part cappucino/part social. Sort of like the Cheers of the 90s and beyond. "Where everybody knows your name..." Well, at least the barista who may also know your usual drink is a 2% dry cap.

When I first read Starbuck's would be selling Via instant coffee, my stomach did a backwards flip. I am old enough to remember my grandparents ordering Sanka from crusty diner waitresses. I can even picture the orange and brown packets. The only thing worse than Sanka might be Sanka with two packs of the "pink stuff." I also recall those little glass jars of Nescafe. Now, I have been drinking java since my pre-school years. While chocolate milk might have been a treat for my friends, I preferred a touch of my mom's coffee in one of those little plastic creamers. It wasn't a huge leap to my own cup of coffee. In fact, in high school, my breakfast was a glass cup of coffee (with skim milk, ycch!), 1/2 cup of Friendship cottage cheese, and a few orange slices or handful of grapes.

I can even remember my very first cappucino, at Fisherman's Wharf during a family trip to San Francisco. Creamy, whole milk, a foamy head. I was hooked.

During college, my friend Adam and I took turns brewing gourmet beans in our mini Krups so when we returned from class, a cup of joe would always be awaiting us. Unfortunately, the 80s were a hey day for flavored blends. We would unvariably purchase Southern pecan, Seville orange, or some other oily beans which would leave us nauseated, dumping the grinds into the trash can.

Adam who later worked his way up the ranks of both Starbuck's and Seattle's Best turned me on to Starbuck's venti iced latte's during a trip to visit him in Chicago. Living in L.A. at the time, I was thrilled when Starbuck's in Pavilion's, my local market.

I currently go back and forth from Starbuck's to a local coffee house which roasts its own beans. But, there is a certain level of comfort derived from being able to grab a venti cap at the airport or in a distant city. I know I will at least have a good, "bold" cup of coffee.

Which leads me to the Via. Why? Certainly not the price point, at approximately a dollar per cup. Convenience? There is still a Starbuck's on almost every corner and most of us own those little thermal carafes.

I think I was most disturbed by the airline/Via connection. Although airplane coffee is a pretty abyssmal brew, second only to those little "coffee-bag" contraptions found in hotel rooms or at the carwash. The best thing about it is that it's free. Well, until now. United Airlines will be selling 3-packs of Via to its in-flight customers. Wonder if they will start charging for the stale pretzels or honey-roast peanuts?

According to Howard Schultz, Starbuck's CEO and my personal rock star, most folks won't be able to tell the difference between freshly brewed coffee and its instant counterpart. I remain a bit skeptical. But, what have I got to lose? I can always sprinkle some into my espresso brownie batter and call it a day!

Cougar vs Python

Wednesday evening's new lineup on ABC presented a few May/December scenarios. "Cougar Town" stars Courtney Cox-Arquette as divorcee/realtor Jules Cobb, navigating the dating scene in Florida. When high school boys steal the realty signs bearing her sexy MLF portrait, her teen son Travis is forced to defend her honor amidst his drooling classmates. Josh Hopkins, my personal choice for TV hottie of the year, portrays Jules' neighbor Grayson Ellis, a divorced guy who dates girls young enough to be his daughters, presuming he fathered children somewhere between high school and his early 20s. Jules ribs him for wearing a hoodie, suggesting he sport feet pajamas if he wants to appear younger than he actually is. On a side note, I found Hopkins tremendously appealing in his turns on "Swingtown," "Brothers and Sisters," and "Private Practice." He is becoming the resident sex symbol on ABC! When Jules' younger partying co-worker takes her to a trendy club, she meets a cute 20-something guy who is quite enthralled by her. Her friend later deposits him at her house for an evening of hot sex and "coitus interuptus" by the pool -- when her cheesy ex and son stop by.

It has been said that women reach their sexual peak somewhere near 38 while men peak at 18. Perhaps this explains the Cougar phenomenon Or that we experienced women who take care of ourselves are hot! Guess we will have to stay tuned for Jules' future adventures. I am rooting for some steamy neighborly interaction between Jules and Grayson. We shall see.

In a more classic May/December romance, Ed O'Neill's patriarch Jay is wed to a much younger woman on "Modern Family." When a good looking guy hits on his wife at his corpulent son's soccer game, the guy presumes Jay is the wife's father. Jay corrects him as he struggles to get up from the soccer chair in his track suit.

Interestingly enough, I spent part of my 20s attracted to "older" men of maybe mid to late 40s. At some point, these men have turned the corner from sophisticated yet youthful to most likely balding geezers in need of Viagra or Cialis. Of course, there are exceptions.

It seems to me that many of us women spend hours at the gym, in yoga or pilates, coloring our hair, and working at maintaining our looks. Of course, I am generalizing. In a twist of payback, the tables are turned. Anything goes, well, almost anything!

The truth is -- age is but a state of mind, not necessarily affixed to a number. Those of us who take care of ourselves, constantly learn and try new experiences will be attracted to each other. The folks eating Pop Tarts while watching TV on the couch...well, you know the drill.

I am curious to see the outcome on these two shows. I did chuckle when Jules commented about her elderly client one day dying beneath his much younger gold digger wife. Shades of Hef and the Girls Next Door...Interestingly enough, Hef's former housemates have gone on to be with guys their own age. A sign of the times?

Garanimals for Grown Ups?

Does anyone remember Garanimals, a children's clothing line of mix and match separates introduced in 1972. Each respective animal represents a color and style to coordinate with any piece in that line. The concept is driven by the idea that how a child dresses will effect their self-concept.

Now, I saw the clothing line on the company website. These Gymboree type collections aren't exactly hip. Lots of thematic graphics and patterns. Not exactly fashion forward.

However, I did get to thinking. What if someone came up with a Garanimal type line for adults? I have seen enough adults in my day who look like they just grabbed whatever looked sort of clean from the hamper and rolled out the door.

What if there was a Cougar line filled with cheetah prints, low cut shirts, and leggings with some metallic thrown in for good measure? How about Cougar prey for 20-something slackers? Baggy pants, backwards baseball caps, and bling? The sloth line for balding middle aged divorced men of Hawaiian shirts, cargo shorts, and same baseball caps. The hippo line for heavy-set county fair attendees or poly blend slacks with elasticized waistbands, track suits, and over blouses.

Then again, since these folks already wear said clothing, perhaps we should go with a more fashion forward look.

Clothes do make the man...or woman...or child. Fashion is a form of self-expression and an art form.

The Perfect Date...I Mean Black Pants!

Earlier today, I listened as a single friend told about her male friend's dating checklist. I couldn't help but think of that weirdly soothing pitchman for e-Harmony. Dr. Neil Clark Warren, founder of the dating website, applied over 35 years as a clinical psychologist and marriage counselor in developing his theory that a laundry list of characteristics can be used to predict compatibility and success in relationships. My friend complained this approach took all the fun out of dating and the discovery process. I would have to agree.

Meeting new people, whether they be potential romantic partners, friends, business associates, or dates, is like unwrapping a gift. Sometimes, we gingerly untie the ribbon and detach the beautiful paper from the box. Other times, we can't wait to rip open the package, especially if wrapped in yesterday's comics. Hmm. At any rate, the fun is in the discovery process. What do we have in common? Any fascinating stories? Chemistry?

Once we lay it all on the line in some computerized inventory, we lose the whole process. Developing relationships shouldn't involve resumes, CV's, and a human resource search.

It's kind of like shopping at the outlet mall or Loehmann's. When you go in looking for that perfect pair of black pants or a white blouse, we probably won't find it. When you least expect it, you'll find that adorable Tory Burch gilded sheath dress which would be perfect to wear to your next cocktail party!

So, single folks, listen up! Put down the mouse! Get out of the house and talk to three strangers today. You never know where you will find a treasure! And the fun is sometimes in the discovery!